When I was young

Growing up I wasn't over weight. I was not tiny by any means but I wasn't chubby. I can remember though my one cousin that I worshiped the ground he walked on told me I would be fat one day. It wasn't said to be mean. He had me put my chin down to my chest and I had a double chin. I must have been about 9 or 10. If I can find a picture of me then I will post it. My Grandma got mad at him and told him not to tell me that. It didn't bother me but it always stuck with me in the back of my head and here I am chubby. 

When I turned 14 and started my period is when I started gaining a little more weight. Again not a whole lot but I know I was a little fuller than other girls. When I got married I weighed about 160 and was my starting weight when I was pregnant with Audrie. I wore a six 13. I still don't view that as fat. To me thats a healthy size. While I would love to be a size that is a single digit I would be happy being a size 12 or even a 10. I know that will be alot of hard work but I'm not s sissy. I'm a HONEY BADGER!

During my pregnancy with Audrie I gained so much weight. I went from 160 to 220!!!! She was a normal size baby. She was a giraffe tho. So long. I think I gained so much weight because I went to a teen parent school for my last year of high school. I quit school the day I turned 18 because my mom was being too controlling and rude. I didn't want to be at home and I didn't want to be at school. So I quit school and moved out the same day. I then worked 10 - 12 hours a day and I loved that. 

I met my husband on the "cruise" one night and the rest was history, I knew he would be mine. 21 1/2 years later he is still mine. I love him so much and wouldn't know what I would do without him. Im sure when one of us dies the other will die of a broken heart. I married him 10 months after my eyes locked onto him. And yes I was already 3 months pregnant. To all those who said it would never last because he was a "bad" boy or because since I was already pregnant that was the only reason we married, I say IN YOUR FACE. 

Since I was pregnant and had a rough early pregnancy with morning sickness I didn't work. So we decided I needed to go back to high school and get my diploma. There was a teen parent school that had opened that year so that's where I went. We were allowed to have food and drinks the whole day. Anytime we wanted it. I know I ate my fair share of stuff I'm sure I didn't need but the weight piled on fast. They tested me for gestational diabetes because of the weight gain and I didn't have it. (It would turn out 5 years later ( I think it really should have been 6 weeks later because she was in the hospital for awhile at 6 weeks old and again at 6 months old ) that Audrie had type 1 diabetes). So I would get lectured at my Dr appointments by the dietician. I know it wasn't meant to be mean. I really was trying to be good. 

With my 2nd pregnancy when I had Scott I started at around 210 and when I had him I was 235-240. So A big difference in the weight gain. After I had him I had my tubes tied and I lost a little weight but I have never seen my weight below 200 since 1991. My weight has been up and down each time getting higher and higher. I always said to myself (because of the double chin thing when I was little so I guess emotionally it did effect me) when I reach 200 I will stop eating. How can anyone let themself get that big? Then of course when I hit 200 it became I will never weigh more than 250. Then it was 275...300...325...350... And here we are at present.

I am going to do this. I was semi successful a few years ago doing a herbalife weighloss challenge. I came in 2nd place. I started at I want to say 340ish and ended at 292. I didn't really exercise then. I mean I did some. I went to Curves in Middleton and would walk on the treadmill or ride the bike but honestly it bored me. there was no one there to influence me. No one cared if I did it or not. That's why I LOVE NAMPAFITSTUDIO . I have my own personal trainer there every time I go. They get excited to see me. They push me to give a little more when they see fit and understand when I need to stop or need modifications. I will continue this forever. 

I have been so luckyto not have a heart attack, high blood pressure, high cholesterol or any other horrible things I have been able to avoid. I have had problems but compared with what I could have go wrong I feel so lucky. I have had major back surgery (but I have a bad back even as a kid. I had (or have I dont know if you ever grow out of it) scoliosis), SEVERE allergic asthma (part of which is probably aggravated by my weight but I am allergic to so many things and they make me sick) , type 2 diabetes (thanks to steroids I was dependent on for 15+ years (massive doses constantly of I wanted to breathe), sleep apnea (100% because of my weight I'm sure) , Gerd (again probably from my weight) and I have Sarcoidosis (which has nothing to do with my weight). 

So this is the year I'm making it happen. The year I'm 40!!